...of a stalkerish fat girl

Let me clarify: I'm not really a stalker. Well, not in a professional or creepy sense of the word. Sure, if you give me the name of your girlfriend or perhaps even the name of your boss, I will be able to track that person down in, like, 30 seconds. But again, not in a creepy sort of way. I'll just find out that person's interests, hobbies, relationship status. If facebook doesn't work, then I move to MySpace. If MySpace fails, then off to Twitter, Google, HotorNot, EHarmony. Believe me, I can find people. I can find out if you're dating a creep who pretends to be a doctor. You could just give me a first name and I could still track that person down. It's really quite a talent I must say. Like a regular ol' detective. Sometimes I get caught up stalking people of my own. I have this amazing talent of remembering things...like ex-boyfriend's passwords or security questions. Once again, it's not really in a creepy way. They shouldn't have shared that information with me in the first place. I get caught up looking at old pictures of ex-boyfriends much of the time and wonder what the hell happend to me. When did I become the one who let myself go? I promised myself I would never, EVER be like that. I would never let a guy control my life. Yet, I still ended up letting men control my life - right down to my eating habits. And then I let them ruin my life by stalking them on social networks and finding out they can lose weight much easier than I can. It's realy quite brutal. I should give up my stalkerish days...I may be a much healthier person. But right now, I'm due to chug a beer and smoke a cig and stalk some more.